I am a little lost. I have spent my life working in the mental health field. Clinically, I know what is going on. Isn't that awesome? I will tell you it does little to alleviate it at all.
I am a go getter. I am a worker bee. I don't let things get me down. I am a fighter. Just not right now. The holidays are approaching, and I just can't want to. I just can't seem to want to get out of bed. It seems to be the hardest thing to do. I don't want to cook, clean my house, go to work, work out, be human. I want to cover my head with the covers and hope for a better time.
I know what the issues are.... The first year of my Grandmother's death is approaching (Christmas Day), my aunt whom I loved so very much just passed, my son is graduating from high school and will be leaving my home this summer, there are significant issues with The Man's oldest son and his parents, my mother's medication for bipolar is going to have to be changed, and I can't seem to find it to get up and go.
I am floundering. this is not a good feeling for me. I am spinning and my little world is spinning right along with me. I don't even know what to ask of The man. He is gone, he is working, so it's up to me. I want to ask him to help me through this muddle. To help me get back on track. To do something, anything to stop this whirlwind I find myself in.