Monday, October 1, 2012

It Spoke to me Today...



This song, it spoke to me today.  Now, I have a strong faith, and live my life a certain way.  I don't shove my love of Jesus on other people.  I try to live my example.  Music has always spoke to my heart in the good times and bad.  So many memories are wrapped up in music.

I am truly struggling right now.  Struggling to be submissive, struggling not to retreat, struggling not to just throw in the towel and go back to the way thing were.  I don't think either of us could do that. Struggling not to strike out in my pain and confusion. Struggling to trust that we will find a way to work through this and come out on the other side having not lost me.

 To me this song is the modern day version of  "Jesus loves me this I know." 

11 comments:

  1. Dana, I just read your last 3 posts. I'm so sorry you are suffering. The song is beautiful. The animals are funny. Neither is enough to get you past this. Please reach out to someone. A friend in real life or someone from the network. Anyone you can open up to who wants only to support you. You should not be going through this alone. There are many people who care about you.

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    1. Joanie, What a wonderful thing to say. Thank you so much for your kindness. I will be okay. I'm just struggling right now.

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  2. Dana - you will come through this - TOGETHER and STRONGER without losing you. You are just overwhelmed right now. Rather than look at and try to do/fix EVERYTHING, take it one step at a time. Remember the old "joke"?

    Man 1: I can eat a whole elephant.
    Man 2: Nah, how?
    Man 1: One bite at a time.

    Back off and take it "one bite at a time" and know that I am here if you want to talk.

    Prayers, Hugs, and Blessings,
    Cat

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    1. I hear ya. I'm just in a bad place today.

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  3. What a beautiful song. You continue to be in my prayers, Dana. He is with you, in your heart, so remind yourself that you are not alone, even when you don't feel Him. Out of the blogs I have visited recently, there are so many needing prayer. I have 12 people or couples on my prayer list. That is just people I do not know personally, but are in a few TTWD blogs. I finally had to start writing them down. I think this time of year is overwhelming to a lot of people. (Looking toward the winter months with all the extra holiday expenses and responsibilities and being stuck inside, children back in school with homework and projects and fees, etc)...Keep listening to uplifting music, share with your husband what you are feeling and ask for prayer and grace, and have faith that you are made worthy through Jesus, you don't have to be worthy. I just read Christina's post on Red Booty Woman. Reading that and listening to the song you posted,lifted me already this morning. Go by and read her post. Love and Prayers, Belle L.

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    1. I am humbled that you would take the time to pray for me. It is just a rough time right now. I am sure we will get there.

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  4. It's a beautiful song Dana. Music has always been something I turn to as well, in good times and in the hard times too. Sometimes it seems that God will lay a certain song on my heart that really speaks to me at the time. I just got caught up on your post and it sounds like this is one of those hard times. Remember, this too shall pass and there are people who love you and care about you. You will get through this. God allows us to go through rough patches for a reason. I admit I don't always understand it myself, especially when I'm in the middle of such a time, but I do try to keep in mind there is a purpose and hang in there the best I can. I hope that this storm passes soon and that you'll be looking at the rainbow and sunshine soon. (((hugs)))

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    1. I just feel like such a failure Grace. I feel like I was given a submission test and made a BIG FAT FFFFF.

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    2. It sounds to me like you're putting too much pressure on yourself and being too hard on yourself Dana. I have often been guilty of the same thing actually. Even if that was true (and I'm not saying that it is), you need to move on. None of us are perfect and we all fall short sometimes, or maybe even, a lot of the time. (((hugs)))

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  5. This is my song, Dana - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CT7x3VnrqbA - yours made me cry too.

    I did a post about self-image and the damage that parents can do to children, and how it colors everything we do and how we see ourselves for the rest of our lives. I can't pretend to offer you the solution on how to fix it, I can't even fix myself. I can hold out my hand and tell you that I understand, and sit with you while you feel the way you do.

    Only one other thing I can offer, you didn't fail, if you tried, with the whole of your heart that was available to you in that moment, you did not fail.

    (((hugs)))

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    1. June,

      I love that song. I am so humbled by what you had to say. Yes, my childhood has colored my world. Sometimes beautiful, sometimes darkly, and sometimes so very hurtful. It is so very hard sometimes. Thank you so much for taking the time to care.

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