Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Well.. Just GRRRRR

I know that my halo is all shiney and stuff.  Being as though I am just so good at this whole yielding thing...  (yes, folks you may need to get your waders out, it's getting deep quickly)

 


I just have this one itty bitty small, really... Hardly noticeable flaw...  I hate being told what to do when it has ANYTHING to do with me, my body in particular.  Time has come, the time is now!  for those of you who have been with me from the beginning of this short journey.  You KNOW, that The Man has insisted on a doctor's appointment with my least favorite doctor, the GYN.  Who comes up with these names?    I have a few more that might be a little more appropriate....

However, since I am wearing my halo.. all shiney and bright...

 
Doesn't she look happy? 
 
 
So...  I was given the overbearing, dictatorial,  loving, instruction to have an appointment made with the doctor by Friday.  I am aware that I am TOTALLY out of grace, leniency, miracles, tolerance, whatever you want to put here.
 
It would be much easier if I was just being a brat about it.  I would much rather be a brat about it.  However, the bottom line is I am terrified of this kind of doctor.  I can't bear for The Man to go because it so hard for me and I am embarassed and humiliated at how hard it is for me, and I fear I wouldn't be able to hold myself together if he went.  (I tend to not be able to build walls when he is around, that's a good thing right?)  Yet, to have to go, I feel like I am leading myself to the slaughter.  I hate having to discuss things, especially when I suspect know something is wrong.
 
I am ashamed of my weakness.  I am angry at being made to do something I don't want, even though I know he feels its for my own good.  This is the struggle.  I know many have struggled.  He has made a decision, I don't like it.  It is my choice to submit.  It is also my choice to yield with a respectful attitude.  I'm not feeling either one right now..  The good news is I have till Friday.....



9 comments:

  1. Darn it Dana. Didn't you just go through this not too long ago with another doctor appointment? And didn't we discuss this at ladies night? I really do understand not liking to be told what to do so how about this from a friend who cares about you. Remember, this is a a request from your friend "Dana, would you please make an appointment ASAP. Please do not wait until Friday to make the appointment. Remember what happened last time? Office closed?"

    If it would help you to talk to another woman about why you are terrified of the gyn, call me.

    You know something is wrong, so please (notice asking) make the appointment.

    Lotsa Hugs,
    Cat

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    1. Cat,
      I know, and part of the reason I'm so prickly is I'm terrified, and I hate that feeling. And yes, I know, and it was the SAME doctor's appointment. So, yes, I'm out of luck, grace, ya get it. I am going to call tomorrow. I think..

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  2. Yeah, I can so relate, Dana. It is incredibly hard submitting sometimes. I'm with Cat though. Please, pretty please, make that appointment first thing in the morning?! Just get it over and done with. You know you need to go anyway. You know you'll feel better once you have. Make the nike motto your motto......

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  3. Hi Dana, new to your blog, very sweet. I don't want to get you in big trouble but if I read his request, it was to MAKE the appointment. So, why not make one for, um January. Nah, New Year's and that's not a fun way to start the year; can't o Feb cause of Valentines Day so March it is!

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    1. Luther said that this was wrong of me and I needed to FIX it now. So Dana, I'm sorry. My husband would (and has had) a cat fit if I delayed or cancelled a doctor's appointment. Now, all kidding aside, if you are scared, ask a very trusted girlfriend to go with you. She can stand by your head, and hold your hand. Doctor visits can be frightening but in most cases, we come out better and relieved.

      All my best, Isabella

      :-P to L

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    2. Isabella,

      Ahhh... we are all so alike. Yes, the thought crossed my mind, in a serious fashion to make it for like JUNE. However, common sense would tell me that is such a bad idea. I hate that these things traumatize me so. I appreciate your honesty. It takes a big person to "fix" it. Our men, they care I know. I am trying to remember that.

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  4. Thanks for sharing the struggle you are experiencing, Dana. Reading it, I got to thinking that maybe you could think about this nasty experience (I don't know anyone who enjoys a visit to the GYN) as a gift to your husband, instead of some rule you now have to follow. The visit to the doc is your way to keep you healthy so you can grow closer to your husband for years, decades, to come. Would you put that kind of future at risk for the price of an hour of emotional and physical discomfort? Wouldn't you buy your husband the best gift you could afford, simply because you love him and want to shower him with good things? A visit to your least favourite doc is not so different from choosing to spend your entire hobby or clothing budget (for the whole year) on your husband instead of yourself... just to get one little gift you know he will appreciate. Don't go to the GYN because you have to (or you will be spanked). Go because you want your husband to be able to enjoy your company for a long, long time.

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  5. You are the most wise woman I think I "know". After I got over the shame of my attitude, and stubborn pride. I humbly called the doctor and made the appointment for when he is home so he can go with me.

    It dawned on me that I do NOT have to do this alone. He loves me and if the tables were turned, I would be right there with him, every step of the way. Thanks so much for you wisdom. All of you guys who sent me messages.

    It just so happened that the Man called me today and I humbled my pride and apologized for my haughty attitude and stubborn defiance, and you know what he said? "Apology accepted. I love you very much babe."

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  6. I hear ya. I have a very real issue with being told to go make an appointment. I am also quite out of chances to do it. Ugh.

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